Socratic_Irony's Xanga

Tuesday, March 16, 2004

Tue, 16 Mar 2004 03:27:01 GMT

someday, someone will know me this well

Til then I'll be waiting in my room, decomposing.

...maybe Someone's just caught in traffic...?

**I ripped the picture and caption off myocean. Talented, talented guy.

Monday, February 23, 2004

Mon, 23 Feb 2004 03:52:38 GMT

Molting

Shed your armor,
show some flesh--
Vulnerability
at its best.
Share your secrets,
Bare your soul.
Releasing part of you,
Makes you whole.
Shields are lowered,
Deflectors down--
Transformation
of a frown,
Or maybe not.
It could be worse--
the shell you've conjured
might not work.
"Dipped in iron,
Wrought in flesh"
A line 'bout hearts,
withstood the test
of shields and flesh
and souls and frowns,
of rising up
and falling down.
Crawl out,
Shout out.
Sing and Dance.
Let loose.
Be free,
And take a chance.

Sunday, February 22, 2004

Sun, 22 Feb 2004 06:20:42 GMT

Now this is my kinda love story.

hand in hand, we crept downstairs, away from so many pairs of prying eyes and thrashing limbs and the constant pounding beat of elecronica. i stole a glance at him expecting to see a small grave frown lingering about his lips. there was none. which was odd since i had dragged him along as my date (a part of me jumped up and down in ecstasy/victory, the part that wanted to feel less "child" and more "woman") to this occasion where he knew practically no one--and he was even more of an introvert than i was. he withdrew into himself when surrounded by strangers, hovering close to the nearest familiar face (mine) and speaking little.

we left the restaurant and stood on the curb, and as i searched his face for an expression i could read i chided myself for being such an incurable sap, but i couldn't help it. under the circumstances, we really had very little opportunities to be with each other alone, and in some delusional way i likened ourselves to pyramus and thisbe, or romeo and juliet. it's forbidden love. well, not really. or not at all, but god, what a thrill.

"what are you thinking about?", he asked, walking me down the cold concrete, into the shade of a beautiful flowering tree. us, i thought instantly, but the word never left my lips. people were used to, were fond of seeing him with her. but she was hurting him. at least that's what i used to think, with my usual martyred air. i...and he...and her...on again and off again and on again like those mad christmas lights in red and green and gold--psychosis! that is what it was.

"i'm thinking about you. i'm glad you came.", i said finally, drawing near to where i could feel the warmth seeping through his clothes. "oh," he grinned sheepishly. "i'm sorry i was late."

he stared at me suddenly, and i shivered under the intensity of it. he leaned in, tilting his head just so...and then a car whizzed past, startling the both of us. our laughter echoed softly under the din of the city, and i felt his arm circling my waist. and then he plucked a flower from overhead (it was rather cinematic, really, the sound of the bough snapping back into position, the leaves whispering against each other). i think he told me that i was beautiful. he told me that, often, and i always knew he meant it, and it always made the heat flood upwards to my cheeks.

i don't remember every single detail. the moments were liquid (they blurred in technicolor hues) and i was happy. how wonderful to be like this and not think about whether he had any regrets about what he had done, and whether he was missing her while he was with me.

on the way hime i snaked my arms around his neck and he was smiling at me in a very fond and familiar way, whispering now and then that he very much liked being with me. i felt a pang in my chest and knew that at this point in my life i needed him more than i'd ever needed anyone. did he feel the same way? sometimes it seemed like i knew exactly what he was thinking, or what he wanted. other times, he thoroughly confused me and i spent hours on end trying to puzzle him out. he kissed me when he dropped me off, and it was soft and moist, long and lingering. i was more than disappointed when he finally let go, and remained standing as i watched the taillights of the car fade away into the night that was all too short.

with a sigh, i threaded my fingers through my hair, looking for that flower which i had planned to press and preseve. but it wasn't there, it must have fallen somewhere along the way, tumbled into some shadowy place by an errant breeze. and all that remained were those precious few moments, thrumming like a secret in my veins, branded as if by fire (or love, come to think of it) into my memory.

Christine del Castillo

It's not overly-sweet yet it captivates the ~~hideousness~~ real "feel" of love. It has some cheese in it, but hey, it's there to capture emotion, and amazingly, it doesn't lessen the quality of the work. I'm not a hard-core "hopeless romantic". I make a fine distinction between sweet and nauseating and this piece treads the fine line that separates the two. Few writers can do that, they usually lean towards one side (I lurk around the borders of sweet&bitter), but this one just hits the spot.

Of course, this is just an opinion... but it's worth a lot coming from someone as cynical as me.

Wednesday, February 18, 2004

Wed, 18 Feb 2004 03:14:21 GMT

Sharp fragments of reality courtesy of Bill Waterson:

--Affluenza

--DEvolution

Monday, February 16, 2004

Mon, 16 Feb 2004 04:37:40 GMT

The laws of God, the laws of man,
He may keep that will and can;
Not I: let God and man decree
Laws for themselves and not for me;
And if my ways are not as theirs
Let them mind their own affairs.
Their deeds I judge and much condemn,
Yet when did I make laws for them?
Please yourselves, say I, and they
Need only look the other way.
But no, they will not; they must still
Wrest their neighbor to their will,
And make me dance as they desire
With jail and gallows and hell-fire.
And how am I to face the odds
Of man’s bedevilment and God’s?
I, a stranger and afraid
In a world I never made.
They will be master, right or wrong;
Though both are foolish, both are strong.
And since, my soul, we cannot fly
To Saturn nor to Mercury,
Keep we must, if keep we can,
These foreign laws of God and man.

.:.in support of same-sex relationships

.:.clarification: this is not by me.

Sunday, February 15, 2004

Sun, 15 Feb 2004 00:34:33 GMT

[	Are you feelin me?	\|	nauseated	]
[	Now Playing	\|	Bad Boys II	]

If the stars were your eyes
They'd be all over space
So I'd glare up at night
And stare at your face

If the sea were your heart
And the waves were my mind
Together we'd be
Existing as time

But since you're up there
And I am down here
I'll wish on the Moon
To know when you're near...

By arenel. I'm not usulally into romanticized poems, but this is exceptional. :sigh: Makes u think...

Sarcastic remarks to get you through the day:

And your crybaby whinny opinion would be...?
This isn't an office. It's Hell with fluorescent lighting.
I started out with nothing & still have most of it left.
I pretend to work. They pretend to pay me.
Sarcasm is just one more service we offer.
If I throw a stick, will you leave?
If I want to hear the pitter patter of little feet, I'll put shoes on my cats.
Does your train of thought have a caboose?
Errors have been made. Others will be blamed.
A PBS mind in an MTV world.
Whatever kind of look you were going for, you missed.
Suburbia: where they tear out the trees & then name streets after them.
Well, this day was a total waste of makeup.
See no evil, hear no evil, date no evil.
Not all men are annoying. Some are dead.
A woman's favorite position is CEO.
I'm trying to imagine you with a personality.
A cubicle is just a padded cell without a door.
Stress is when you wake up screaming & you realize you haven't fallen asleep yet.
Can I trade this job for what's behind door number 1?
I thought I wanted a career, turns out I just wanted paychecks.
Too many freaks, not enough circuses.
Macho Law prohibits me from admitting I'm wrong.
Nice perfume. Must you marinate in it?
Chaos, panic, & disorder - my work here is done.
I plead contemporary insanity.
How do I set a laser printer to stun?
Meandering to a different drummer.
I majored in liberal arts. Will that be for here or to go?
No time to go skiing?

25 Facts of Life;
1. If you're too open minded, your brains will fall out.
2. Age is a very high price to pay for maturity.
3. Going to a church doesn't make you religious any more than going to a garage makes you a mechanic.
4. Artificial intelligence is no match for natural stupidity.
5. If you must choose between two evils, pick the one you've never tried before.
6. My idea of housework is to sweep the room with a glance.
7. Not one shred of evidence supports the notion that life is serious.
8. It is easier to get forgiveness than permission.
9. For every action, there is an equal and opposite government program.
10. If you look like your passport picture, you probably need the trip.
11. Bills travel through the mail twice the speed of checks.
12. A conscience is what hurts when all your other parts feel so good.
13. Eat well, stay fit, die anyway.
14. Women are from Earth. Deal with it.
15. No husband has ever been shot doing the dishes.
16. A balanced diet is a cookie in each hand.
17. Middle age is when broadness of the mind and narrowness of the waist change places.
18. Opportunities always look bigger going than coming.
19. Junk is something you've kept for years and throw away three weeks before you need it.
20. There is always one more imbecile than you counted on.
21. Experience is a wonderful thing. It enables you to recognize a mistake when you make it again.
22. By the time you make ends meet, they move the ends.
23. Thou shall not weigh more than thy refrigerator.
24. Someone who thinks logically provides a nice contrast to the real world.
25. Blessed are they who can laugh at themselves for they shall never cease to be amused.

Saturday, February 14, 2004

Sat, 14 Feb 2004 08:31:51 GMT

AUGUST: Loves to joke. ~~Attractive.~~ ~~Suave and caring~~. Brave and fearless. Firm and has leadership qualities. ~~Knows how to console others~~. Too ~~generous~~ and egoistic. Takes high pride of oneself. Thirsty for praises. Extraordinary spirit. Easily angered. Angry when provoked. ~~Easily jealous~~. Observant. Careful and cautious. Thinks quickly. Independent thoughts. Loves to lead and to be led. Loves to dream. Talented in the arts, ~~music~~ and defense. Sensitive but not petty. Poor resistance against illnesses. Learns to relax. Hasty and trusty. Romantic. Loving and caring. Loves to make friends.